The Study of Time and Pressure

The Study of Time and Pressure

One of the more memorable parts from the film Twelve Angry Men, at least for myself, is when the protagonist, Henry Fonda’s Juror #8, asks E.G. Marshall’s glasses wearing Juror #4 to recall how he spent his time over the past few days. By the time Marshall’s character reaches three of four nights back (my memory is foggy: hence theme!) he cannot recall the titles of the two films he’d seen with his wife, thus illustrating the brevity and delicate veracity of memory for both the jurors and the audience. 

It was a key sequence in the film (although one could argue every single sequence in that film is key. There’s a reason it’s ranked the fifth greatest movie of all time on IMDB) that continued to turn the tide in favor of Fonda and the young defendant, but when I first viewed the film in my early twenties, it was the only argument that struck me as contrived and even disingenuous. “Who the hell can’t remember what they were doing three days ago?” asked my twenty-three-year-old self. “What sort of mind allows itself such forgetfulness? Plotting blasphemy!”

 “Your mind, you idiot,” my thirty-one-year-old self responds. “Now you forget the simple minutia that constitutes what you were doing this time five days ago. And guess what? Ten years from now it will absolutely be three nights ago. Now go write this idea for a blog post down before it floats away into the stratosphere.”

Basically, I’m getting old. Old enough to know that I don’t really know anything. Old enough to understand the arrogance of youth, but still young enough to occasionally fall into its passionate pitfalls. The passage of time used to be taken for granted, but that’s not the case any longer. It’s becoming more and more of a precious commodity. I’ve never been big on birthdays as celebrations, but now they are seen as the milestones they really are. At thirty-one, I look back on my life and see everything that has happened and think, “Holy shit, this life is crazy. How am I still alive?” It must be an extraordinary feeling at the age of forty (the word despondence definitely isn’t coming to mind), and more and more so on down the line. 

My Grandma shared this quote with me several months back. “Today is the oldest you've ever been, and the youngest you'll ever be again.” ― Eleanor Roosevelt.

Time humbles everyone. Its passage dictates life’s goals and makes anything worth doing both difficult and beautiful. I’m finally able to empathize with all of those that must struggle against that always-ticking clock (read: literally every human that ever existed). From the four-year-old who can’t remember where he left is favorite toy (it’s in his hand) to the eighty-four year-old widower that grasps with sad but enviable nostalgia onto that one of many priceless memories of her deceased husband (it dominates her heart), time makes comedy and tragedy of us all. Peggy Olson tells Peter Campbell during an episode of the greatest television series ever made (Mad Men), “It’s not easy for anyone, Pete.” 

Time continues to win its battle against all of us, but the spoils do not all go to the victor. Keenness runs its course, producing wisdom as caution replaces vigor; the selfishness of youth can transcend into an empathy for (or manipulation of) others; the fires of passion and unbridled love are molded into temperance and respect. Time makes us earn these lessons.

I have not yet come close to achieving my goals in this life, but I’m working on it. Time willing. This is all a long-winded way of getting to The Principles of Posterity, and my pride (hello ego) in both that novel’s completion and its content. It took approximately fourteen months to write the book; the first draft was completed on January 14^th, 2016, after which a few drinks were had while watching The Dark Knight Rises (Bane isn’t The Joker, but damn is he a badass villain). That feeling of completing a difficult project over the course of such a long time is incredible. It’s one part bewilderment, one part ecstasy, one part exhaustion, and three parts elation. It was one of the best nights of my life. I’ll always remember it. 

What started out as a little distraction or reprieve between my first novel, Check to the Better, and its sequel, soon blossomed into a sci-fi epic (pretty sure it can be called an epic) that monopolized my worry, ideas, and life. Hundreds upon hundreds of writing and editing sessions later, a short novel originally planned to take two months at most had turned into a behemoth that took almost two years to reach publication. 

By the time The Principles of Posterity (TPOP) was ready for the masses, I’d become a head case regarding its quality. It doesn’t matter if you’re working over the greatest novel ever written, reading and editing it for the fifth time will make you squirm, worry, and agonize over every word, sentence, paragraph, chapter, and plot in the book. The more complicated and lengthy the novel, the more exacerbated this effect becomes.  A passage would be loved one day and loathed the next. When TPOP was finally released on September 28^th, there was far more relief than excitement. Now, with the help of time (boo-yah), I can look more objectively (objective right? Right. Definitely no bias around these parts) at the work and absolutely enjoy its existence in this finite world of ours. 

I enjoy the story, the characters, and the twisting and turning plot. I enjoy the structure of the novel (fairly original), and how that structure lends itself to creating far more character depth and immersive plotting. It’s awesome that so much time was spent on a project that can be looked back at it with a genuine fondness that will be with me for the rest of my life.  After all of that work, it can honestly be said that TPOP is a novel I would pick up off of the bookshelf and read (or, more likely, download onto the Kindle app). About a third of the way through this life’s journey—barring tragedy or some awesome scientific advancements—I’ve finished a second novel. It shaped me as I created it. I put everything—heart, soul, understanding, and imagination—into that damn book, and came out with something that might just be worth reading.  

I’ll leave it to another writer to express my feelings towards this chosen profession. The quote comes from the final episode of Westworld. (That first season was great, by the way, and there are, ahem, quite a few similarities between it and TPOP. If you enjoyed Westworld, TPOP could be right up your alley.) And don’t worry, no spoilers ahead: 

Dr. Robert Ford (played by Anthony Hopkins): “Since I was a child... I always loved a good story. I believed that stories helped us to ennoble ourselves, to fix what was broken in us, and to help us become the people we dreamed of being. Lies that told a deeper truth. I always thought I could play some small part in the grand tradition.”

Yup, that about sums it up. 

Speaking of time, I guess I’d better get back to writing Check to the Better’s sequel. What’s it been? Two years and change already? My goodness. 

The eBook and print versions of The Principles of Posterity and Check to the Better are available at Amazon and almost all other eBook retailers.

Check to the Better: Michael Carver Excerpt

Michael Carver

Chapter 20

“August sixth and ninth, 1945.” The guttural rumble of Baxter’s voice pronounced an enigmatic statement that Michael sensed was meant for his ears.

“Sir?”

“The days we dropped the bomb on Japan. Sealed civilization’s fate then, we’ve just been delaying the inevitable ever since.” Baxter stared straight ahead, not looking in Michael’s direction.

Michael circled the statement, knowing the best way to entertain a fisherman is not by taking the bait, but by nibbling at it, creating anticipation for the catch. “But haven’t the greatest advances in human history taken place since World War Two? I think it’s arguable that the deterrent factor of nuclear war created an environment of peace and creation where real brute force became out of the question. The population boomed, age expectancy rose, and life got easier. The end of all existence is a great intimidation, right?”

“The calm before the storm. Both world wars and this hundred-some-odd years of prosperity are a drop in the bucket of man’s existence on this earth. Always, human beings have sought war and conquest over their fellow man. There is not a single point in all of Homo sapiens’ history where blood wasn’t spilled in the name of what’s yours is mine, what’s your God’s is my God’s, or, worse yet, what’s your country’s is my country’s.”

Michael contemplated for a moment. “Still, though, in all mankind’s history there was never the threat of assured destruction if both parties actively sought war.”

Baxter grunted, “Aye, the MAD theory, right? Mutually Assured Destruction for everyone. But that presupposes there aren’t egotistical maniacs out there given the keys and power to rule millions of people utilizing physical force. Do you realize what kind of insatiable lust for power drives a man into presidency or dictatorship?”

Yes, Michael thought. He said, “Go on.”

“These men are certifiable sociopaths given the means of destruction by feigning omnipotent benevolence for their fellow man. Take the United States, for instance. It is the greatest country ever in the history of the world, built successfully on the principles of a democratic republic. Yet, paraphrasing Sir Winston Churchill here, it is the least worst form of government. The USA in its current state is what happens when you give a person with great political ambition a means to manipulate the masses into granting him power over their lives. It’s taken more than two hundred years for the empire to coalesce and rot into what it’s become today, but when you grant the people power to vote themselves money and the government increases in size, strength, and might, guess what politicians get elected? Tell me what type of person you think comes into control of a vast nuclear arsenal, given the established system in place through centuries of ‘freedom’ through democracy?” Baxter humphed with the last sentence, stretching his arms and legs out with exaggerated movements.

Briefly taken aback by the brutal honesty of the diatribe, Michael chuckled, “I always thought you might be a closet anarchist, sir.”

Baxter listened, then looked over at Michael intently. “Don’t be ridiculous. Just because I know the game is fixed doesn’t mean I should refuse to play. Quite the opposite. Notice before that I basically stated that democracy was the least of all government evils. I’ll actively participate and pursue success in a system predicated upon the utilization of force simply because man’s basic animal nature makes it completely necessary to have a governing body in place capable of utilizing force.” He paused a moment, thinking on his next comment. “It’s just this time the stick grew too big. Which opens up another rabbit hole entirely. ‘Mankind’s demise was predestined,’ et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.”

“What do you mean by ‘man’s basic animal nature’?” Michael found himself genuinely enthralled by the old man’s musings.

“Look, son, here is the secret nobody ever likes to talk about. It’s the foundational building block that drove humanity to its greatest successes and also the guillotine forever hanging over civilization’s neck. Each and every single individual throughout the entire universe seeks superiority over his or her peers. It’s biologically coded into our DNA. My central function in life, my reason for being, is to impregnate the most beautiful woman I can find and become a superior man to everyone else around me. For those without the intellectual capability of outthinking their peers, there will always be the adoption of force at their disposal. Now, don’t give me some altruistic crap about loving one’s neighbor. Pit two of the most benevolent, charitable, loving men against each other with starving families to feed and a piece of bread between them. See how far altruism takes a man when survival is at stake.”

Michael decided to play devil’s advocate. “But isn’t the greatness of our civilization built upon the fundamental principle of do unto your neighbor as you would have done unto you? I mean, you can’t tell me that we’re all brute thugs, beasts, at heart. Take this jet we currently fly on, for instance. Only through a free-willed, independent intelligence nurtured within a society of like-minded individuals predicated on peaceful existence could such a marvel of science be thought up and constructed.”

            Baxter took the argument in stride. “Right—society’s contract. A contract bound by the threat of force through government intervention. Without the gun of government held over the populace’s heads, do you think the Wright brothers would have had the time and safety to construct their flying apparatus? And here’s the killer: what type of people did that airplane’s power and capability eventually fall into the hands of? Who do you think enabled the delivery of those nuclear bombs over the island of Japan? Potentially across the world as we speak? What type of man did Albert Einstein’s most powerful invention empower? The man holding the gun. When the only thing keeping you safe from someone taking everything you hold dear is the threat of force, then that threat forms the basic function of survival. All of humanity’s greatest accomplishments were only made possible by the forced deference of everyone else who wanted to do you one better, whose basic instinctual drive is to do you one better. If they could, they would. If they can’t, they’ll take it from you. If they can’t take it from you, they’ll join the government. That’s why I’m a lobbyist living in the greatest country in the history of the world, flying in a private jet representing the marvels of modern science, attempting to escape all-out nuclear war.”

Excerpt from CHECK TO THE BETTER

by Grant Gregory

Now Available on Kindle: http://www.amazon.com/Check-Better--Day-Book-1-ebook/dp/B00OMGGHLY/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1415053024&sr=8-1&keywords=check+to+the+better

Also available on Nook, Kobo, and iBooks.

Copyright © 2014 by Grant Gregory. All rights reserved. No part of this text may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, reposting, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without express written permission of the author.

Favorite Movies of All-Time #3: The Godfather Parts I & II

3. The Godfather Parts I & II, Francis Ford Coppola, 1972, 1974

Why is it one of my most favorite movies of all time?

Both movies are not only widely recognized as historic masterpieces of cinema, but also as defining depictures of 20^th century America and her complex glory and withering achievements. I decided to include both movies together because I believe the first viewing experience molds perfectly into the sequel (not unlike LOTR, but indulge me. If you must, see them as 3a and 3b). What can I say in this obscure blog post that hasn’t been mentioned about these works of art? The story is deep and original; the acting unique and incredible; the cinematography, setting, and visual mood of the films takes me on a journey across six beautiful decades of American history. Coppola created two timeless works of art in the span of three years whose majesty and perfection will always be remembered. Enough said.

Favorite Scenes:

            Michael killing Sollozzo and McCluskey; Sonny at the toll booth; Vito giving an impassioned speech to the Mafia heads from around the country; Young Vito walking through the market place of Little Italy at the beginning of his arc in Godfather 2 (that tracking shot is one of my all-time favorites: the grit of the street, the haphazard arrangement of the market place, loose chickens rummaging around, traders hawking their wares, new world buildings rising and growing old on all sides. It takes me back to early 20^th century New York City. I’m right there when I watch that scene. It’s priceless.); Young Vito scaling the rooftops, biding his time, planning murder, and following the movements of the Black Hand through the parade; “I know it was you, Fredo. You broke my heart.”; Michael contemplating his decision on how to handle Fredo’s betrayal as snow falls into Lake Tahoe behind floor-to-ceiling windows.

And, yes, gun to my head I choose part two over part one, but the world is so wonderful, I get to have both.

Lasting Memory of the Viewing Experience: 

            I very much look forward to my Godfather marathons which take place at least twice a year. The thought comes to me a week or two out that I haven’t watched the films in a while. Then, I plan ahead for the day with great anticipation every time. The day of, I jump into a poker tournament or two and start the journey, knowing as soon as I hear this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kvKXt3Surlk, it’s going to be a wonderful seven hours ahead.  

Other Movies from the Director that I Love:

Apocalypse Now is its own kind of crazy, unique masterpiece. “The horror. The horror.” Indeed.

Up next: “Don't you want to take a leap of faith? Or become an old man, filled with regret, waiting to die alone.”

And my #1 favorite movie of all-time: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYhg5IOkar8&list=PLD007D50FEE3154C8&index=10